Why we hate… Richmond

Posted on 04 January 2011 by NLP

Return of the hate!  We at GTG.net occasionally get sidetracked by things.  J Felt is an avid homebrewer and gets lost in the hops.  C-Pip has the creepy ginger thing going on and that takes up a lot of his time.  NLP has his hands full with Emmy Rossum and Alpha Duster.  jobetro composes sonnets for Judy Rose.  McFly… well we don’t quite know what he does and frankly we’re scared to ask.

So those are our collective excuses, but enough of those and onto to the hate.  We’re going out of order a bit with our next target with Richmond, which has a way of provoking all sorts of hate with the Niners.  So without further ado…

First off, the requisite vital stats…

Mascot: Spiders
Founded: 1830
Location: Richmond, VA
Colors: UR Red and UR Blue
2009-2010 record: 26-9 (13-3 conference)
2009-2010 vs. Charlotte: (1-1) Charlotte 71 @ Richmond 59, Richmond 89 CHARLOTTE 84 (OT)
All-time versus Charlotte: 7-6

Emmy Rossum is all smiles whenever we beat Richmond, which needs to happen EVERY TIME POSSIBLE.

NLP:  These guys suck and I hate them.  They ruin everything good for us.  First instance:  2006 when Bobby gets tossed by Jose Carrion in a game @ Richmond, one of a small handful of games that kept us out of the tournament in a year a very weak GW team ran the table in A10 regular play. This game and a bullcrap foul by Mike Hall in the @GW game were a pair of games that could have put us over the hump and snuck us in as an at-large. Further making the blood boil was their obnoxious fans, who didn’t even notice the game.  All they could do was obsess over Antwan Coleman (we all know it was Wabash CC envy).  That drive home down I85 was a nightmare.  I was exhausted from yelling my lungs out the entire game plus I had to sit next to Powerbait which only made things.  Actually I wonder if I hate him more than I hate Richmond… I’ll save that for another day.  Anyway on the way back I literally (which means I really had to) stopped at every rest area along the way for a nap because I couldn’t keep my eyes open.  I think the suckitude of the Robins Center (an arena which is rotting from the inside-out) gave me a case of narcolepsy that Curtis Withers would be proud of.

Of course, that’s not all Richmond ruined.  There’s also the four straight wins they rang off against us from 2008 – 2009, which included the 2008 Homecoming game where the Niners seemingly shot 10% from the field and Leemire Goldwire hit a whopping 1 shot.  In a year where they went 16-15 and we were maybe one or two regular season wins from the tournament, it was a really crappy and lousy thing for Richmond to do.  I hate you Richmond, you guys have no spines.  Seriously, you’re arachnids.  You do not possess spines.  A pox on all of you, I can’t wait to sweep you.  Oh, and E.B. White is a terrible author.  Take that! On the 49erFantatics.com HateMeter, Richmond comes in at a loathsome 7.

Coach Mooney gets to celebrate Other Father's Day!

C-Pip: Where do I start with my HATE for Richmond, I know, how about their 3-game winning streak on OUR FLOOR!  Only three teams have put together a winning streak like that in Halton Arena; Charlotte, George Washington and Richmond(One of these is not like the other).  Richmond joins George Washington as the 2nd road team on that list, and in THE Niner Nation, you are just asking to be hated upon if you lump yourself in with George Washington statistically.  Their 3rd victory was the most devastating, as the 49ers appeared to have ended their slump and back on track to an NCAA birth, being up 3 on the Spiders in the closing seconds only to have Kevin “Not-a-Man”-derson knock down a three and take it to over time.  Also, Chris Mooney is the abandoned love child of Bobby Bobbit(from One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest) and comedian Jeff Ross.  Gross.

J Felt: Ah, Richmond, the first school in the A14 I hated right away (the GW elbow game would come later). I too made the trip up to Richmond in 2006 and watched as our At Large hopes were flushed down the drain via two technicals in a row. The Spiders’ slow and deliberately painful to watch and defend offense confounded our Niners and was a sign of future struggles to come. If it weren’t for a generous Gordon family and an ample supply of beer, my fandom may not have survived the trip.

But the Richmond evils don’t end there. As NLP mentioned, Richmond later went on to beat us four times in a row. Be it home or away, good team or bad team, they put us in our place. Nothing was sacred, not even homecoming. Sure, Charlie Coley and his ‘fro put down a sick slam dunk, but it didn’t matter because those damn arachnids would play this thing called “smart basketball” and just make us look silly. As the two Southern teams in a Northern conference, you’d think we’d stick together. Nope, Richmond refuses to.

Last year, we finally broke the curse and squashed the Spiders in Richmond. It would only have been fair if Richmond would let us win the next three in a row, evening things up. Instead, they come down to Halton, let us think we’re going to win in regulation, and then stab a dagger into our already damaged hearts by beating us in OT. Kevin Anderson, I hope you get bit by an Irony Spider and have to sit out the Niner games this season.

On the 49erFantatics.com HateMeter, Richmond is scoring an impressive 8. Plus, Mooney is a stupid name.

1 Comments For This Post

  1. Stonecoldken Says:

    I hate Richmond because they cried to the radio station that Sweringen was mean to them. All homers are mean to the other team. You'd think fans of a poisonous animal would be a bit tougher. Boo hoo UR grads!

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